Ferdinand Vanek Award 2017 > Football in Czechia > Football in Czechia - extract

Football in Czechia - extract

B: Sorry, I’m late.
A: Oh, it’s no big deal. (He points around himself)
Or do you think it is? 
B: There is so much I have to tell you about!
A: You’ve been to the doctor’s?
B: No, something much more important. I had an idea how to get out this misery…
A: What misery?
B: Don’t interrupt me! And don’t pretend you do not know what I’m talking about.  That it is pretty miserable here or if you do not understand the word misery, well, then, it is all fucked up, there’s no doubt about it. Besides, that’s everything we’ve been talking about here the entire time…
A: But.. well, they are…
B: I told you not to interrupt me! And don’t say it’s just bullshit. I’m not stupid. But sometimes bullshit is more than just bullshit. You understand? Hey, don’t interrupt me. At first I’ll tell you what I came up with and then I’ll let you talk. OK? To your health! (They both drink).
A:  Oh Jesus! It’s so stale.
B: Sorry, my fault.  I was late. I’ll get you the next one.
A: Would you mind getting it right now?
B: Hey, first listen to me and then I’ll get you ten beers if you like.
A: You really must be eager.
B: Sorry, but I really had a fantastic idea. (Makes a short pause) I think that we should initiate a national petition to our Football Association to make a decision that here in Czechia we should start playing football only with ten players. What do you say? It’s a bombshell, right?!
A: And that’s all?
B: Wait a minute… you didn’t get it, did you?
A: That we should play with ten players? Is there any deeper meaning to it? It is impossible as it is, to watch them play now with eleven players.
B: That’s the point, dude. Don’t you get it? It is absolutely brilliant. Well, even if it’s my idea. But that’s not important now. It’s about the gesture. About the idea behind this!
A: Well, I’m probably too slow or something, but it still does not seem brilliant to me. In addition, I swore not to sign, let alone write, any petitions after the end of totalitarianism. We have democracy now, dude, if you haven’t noticed.
B: So what? Is that a problem?